let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
