let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
