so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
