I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize
