it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize