she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Im part way to drunk.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
