i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
Randomize
