I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
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