Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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