I wish I could punch you in the face.
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
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