You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
