hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
