You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Randomize
