the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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