we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Randomize
