if i can run in heels then i can drive
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Randomize
