Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
She just used a chaser for red wine.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
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