That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
He's a Shit stain on my heart
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Randomize
