do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
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