are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
