You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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