Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Randomize
