All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize
