It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Umm I'm too high to move.
He uses pillows to masturbate.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Randomize
