Sry I called you an 8
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
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