the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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