His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I have fence marks all over my body
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize