Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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