i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Randomize
