that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Randomize
