I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
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