He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
