Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
Randomize
