roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
I feel like a drive thru vagina
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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