I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Randomize
