So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Randomize
