i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize
