I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
