they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Randomize
