did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
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