would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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