i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
