Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
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