well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
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