we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
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