the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize