I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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