She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
