...so i touched it.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize
