So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
